Stares
by Greg'sgirl5
Summary: "Every time I look at you, I can fool myself. Pretend that things are the way they used to be. When we were happy, and we spent every moment we could together. But eventually, I have to come back to reality." Greg/Nick angst.
1. Chapter 1

AN: Okay so, I don't know why I wrote this. I've never written Greg and Nick slash before. I wasn't sure how, and I wasn't sure if I was even in support of it. (No offence to those who are.) But as I read more slash stories, it grew on me more and more. The thing is, I can't get my inspiration from other stories. It has to be from the show. And they don't really hint at anything between Nick and Greg. But as Grissom would say- "You must keep an open mind and look for the clues." And I did. There are those little things that you nearly miss. So I hope this lives up to others.

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

I watch you as you work a case, oblivious to my stare. Your broad shoulders are bent over, in a focused way. I've been watching you for a while now, my current case completely forgotten.

Every time I look at you, I can fool myself. Pretend that things are the way they used to be. When we were happy, and we spent every moment we could together. But eventually, I have to come back to reality.

You broke my heart Nick. You were everything to me. No matter how upset I was, how tired, or angry, you could bring me back to earth. And without you, I'm lonely. Lonelier than I ever realized a person could be.

My apartment is empty without you. The couch seems bigger and colder without you sitting beside me, laughing at the comedies we watched. Those are the memories I'll never forget. My bed's empty too. When I wake up in the middle of a nightmare, and reach over to find the sheets empty... my heart feels like its shattered.

You were my world Nicky. Every thought I had was a circle, and you were the center. My life was good then, when I was with you. If I had a nightmare about the beating, or the explosion, or even about you being buried alive, your strong arms made the pictures fade away. When you held me close, I felt special. Maybe I'm not.

Why can't I tell you all this? That's like asking why the sky is blue. I have no idea. Maybe it's because I still love you. Because even though you don't love me, I still get butterflies. Maybe it's your eyes. When you look at me it's like an x-ray. I feel like you know all my thoughts, all my desires. But maybe its just fear. Fear that you'll break me again.

I didn't mean what I said that night. None of it. And I worry that that's the only reason that you left me, and that I could have stopped it.

I know I don't deserve you. I'm just the goofy lab geek turned CSI. I'm just the guy with the crazy hair, bad jokes and loud music that everyone hates. But you're perfect. You're the best CSI in Vegas. Maybe the world. We'd have to see though, we can't forget Grissom.

But Nick, you're amazing. You have the best smile in the world. It makes everyone happy. And I know you hate how emotional you are, but it just means you care. I wish I was more like that.

Actually I wish for a lot of things. I wish we hadn't fought, and you hadn't left. I wish I knew how to watch my words. I wish that you knew all of this and that you'd just walk across the hall and kiss me. But what's the point of wishes? The world is full of them. And they never come true.

Dreams might. Because you being with me was exactly that. And even though I woke up early, and the dream was cut short, I'll never forget it. Or you.

XXX

I feel your stare as I pretend to work. I feel them all, everyday. I wonder if you feel mine, but I honestly don't know if I want you to.

The guilt is horrible. I walked out. I made the choice and I ended everything. But what you said to me was worse. And even worse, is that for the first time, I think you might have meant it.

I still wonder why you said it. Why you acted that way. I want to blame you, but I can't. You're too perfect. At least in my mind.

Greg, I loved you. More than anyone I've ever known. I still do. But I don't think you love me. You said you did, but did you? Did you really mean what you said? When you told me –no, more like yelled at me- that I was over controlling and bossy, did you mean that?

I wish I knew. I wish you would tell me. But it's not your fault. You shouldn't have been with me. You deserve so much more. I don't.

I don't deserve you. I'm just the Texan CSI, the overly emotional and always affected one. The guy who's always screwin up, gettin hurt and hurtin everyone else. But you're... I can't even describe you, G. You're perfect. You're brave and smart... both things I'm not. You're everything anyone would be lucky to have. You were the best boyfriend I'd ever had. When I cried, you hugged me and shared my tears. When I laughed, it was because of you. Your funny jokes, and your goofy sayings. I'd never been so happy.

Every smile was caused by you. Every laugh had you at the center. You were my life.

I loved you so much. I loved everything about you. Your 1000 watt smile, which never failed to surface many more. Your amazing hair, that's been changing from the beginning. When you think back you now say it was tacky. I don't think so. I loved it. But what I loved the most, correction- what I _do _love the most, is your eyes. Your beautiful eyes. They're endless, chocolate brown orbs, which never cease to amaze me. It's one of the reasons I've been avoiding you.

Truthfully, there's a million reasons why. If I had to narrow it down to one... I don't think I could. I guess it would be this:

I love you. And that's never going to change. And even though I know I should tell you this, I can't. You're Greggo, and you're amazing.

**Review please :P I could write more if it was wanted **


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Okay I hope you like it! And thanks for the reviews guys! Cleo2010 and becauseicantwritemyownnovel you both have ideas I'm going to use!

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

I'm still staring at you when Sara walks in. I ignore her, no need to hide my feelings. She knows.

"Come on Greg. Just talk to him." She says firmly, but all I can do it watch you.

Your eyes are on the computer screen, reading something. It must be a long article, because you haven't moved in awhile. You look good like that, the screen's light illuminating every feature. Your deep eyes, your perfect jaw. And your not so short hair which is in need of a cut. If we were still together I'd probably be bugging you about it. But we're not.

"Seriously, Greggo." Sara says from behind me, and she places a hand on my shoulder. I continue to look at you, as does she.

I wonder if you know. That we're staring...that all I do is stare. You must have realized by now, you're smarter than the average person. Actually, you're smarter than a smart person. In my mind you're a genius. You've never agreed, but you're just humble.

I miss you. So much. I never thought you could miss someone this much. I want your arms around me, my head on your shoulder, smiling at a cute movie. I want you to laugh when I tell you about Hodges's latest bragging session. I want you to kiss me after a long days work. Wow, I want a lot of things. But really, I just want you.

Finally, I break my stare and look at Sara. Her eyes are knowing, and her lips are in a firm line. She knows what I'm thinking. She's my best friend.

"No, Sar. I can't just talk to him." I tell her, but she doesn't believe it. I expect her to be angry, but she uses a different approach.

"You miss him don't you?" Those words hit me hard. Hell yes. I miss you every day.

All I can do is nod at her.

"You need to communicate. Nothing's going to change if you don't." She says this sentence slowly, and I think of you.

All my emotions rise at once, threatening to bring me to tears. You were my everything. Maybe you still are Nicky.

"I can't. He doesn't love me anymore Sara. He just doesn't. Maybe he never did, not like I would know. It sucks, yeah. The whole house feels empty, like part of its missing." I rant on, watching as her face changes from speculative to sympathetic. "But I feel like part of me's missing too! Like... like he _was _part of me."

She looks at me strangely. I wish she wasn't here. I was perfectly fine on my own, watching you. You can calm me down, even when your the reason I'm mad. You were special that way.

"He's your missing puzzle piece Greg." Her voice is so sure, I wonder if she'd been planning to tell me this all along. "Everyone needs there's. Grissom is mine and I know how you feel. When he's in Paris... the house is cold. Lonely. And so am I Greg."

My thoughts are still on you, but I find myself imagining her alone in her and Grissom's townhouse. It's odd imagining her that way. But really, if that was the case, she's just like me. And there I go again, making everything about you.

"Still," I start, trying to make her understand. I love you Nicky. I do. But I can't talk to you.

"Still nothing. You have to talk to him." Sara tells me, softly squeezing my arm before walking quietly out of the room.

I don't know why she doesn't get it. It's so simple. I can't talk to you. I... I don't really know why. Because you're you.

I can't hold on any longer and I look over at you. But to my surprise, instead of the side of your beautiful face, I'm looking straight into your soulful eyes.

Blushing, I grab the first document near me, and pretend to read it, all the while wishing the shocked butterflies would leave my stomach in peace.

XXX

I saw that Greg. I saw you look at me that way. But... what exactly was the way you looked at me? There was a longing there.

You look down blushing deep red, which I have the urge to smirk at. You're so cute when you blush. You're always cute though.

I watch as you fumble with the papers, pretending you had just glanced up casually, not to stare. But I know the truth. Maybe more than you realize, because I was staring too.

G, I want you back. I love you more than you'll ever know. You're special. You were the only person I can be honest with, and admit everything to. You're adorable, funny, understanding, caring... and a trillion other things.

I'm still watching you as you glance up again, trying to be nonchalant. This time I flush red as you catch me staring. I look back at the computer, but I cant stop thinking about you.

You were my other half. Actually, I think you still are. Because I feel ripped in half right now. I have since I left. All I do at night is lie on the couch, drinking beer, unable to stop myself from thinking of you.

I wish you knew of all the tears I shed for you. All the sleepless days, the tired half-jobs at work, and especially, of all my stares.

But I guess you'll never know, because I can't talk to you. Catherine's been hounding me for days, telling me to talk to you. But I can't. I just can't.

**Like? More's coming thanks to my amazing readers! Please review, or else how will I know I you like it?**


	3. Chapter 3

AN: And they're finally making progress! Good boys! Thanks to all the reviewers, I love you and your ideas, hint hint.

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

"What?" I ask Catherine in disbelief. Did she actually have the nerve to assign me a case with you? Does she think that's a good idea? Because if she does, she'd really, really mistaken.

"Nicky, you can't avoid him forever; you're the only two available CSIs." Catherine tells me motherly, but all I can do is think of you.

What would I do on a case with you? It would be... well, I don't know. If I can't talk to you, were going to have a problem. And as far as I know, I'm unable to communicate with you.

What would I say? After what happened between us, how could we just work on a case? You must hate me for walking out. I ruined it all. You've probably moved on, found someone else. The thought makes me jealous, G. I still love you, no matter what.

"I can't Cath. It's..." I trail off, because my thoughts go back to your face the night it happened.

I'd never seen you so upset. Not after the beating, or the explosion... or anything. You looked so...devastated. To be fair, I probably looked the same way. We'd fought before, but never like that.

I thought about what it would be like to work with you again. I miss it, but I'm avoiding it. I miss the jokes you cracked, which took away from the sadness. I miss the smirks you gave me when we came up with a particularly good idea. I really miss how smart you were, and how when I had no clue, you somehow had it all put together.

But I can't just work with you again. No.

I sigh as I look at Catherine, she seems annoyed at me trailing off. "I just can't."

"Nick. It's that or lose your job. Pick one."

I guess I have no choice. But how are we going to do this?

My feet make me move down the hallway, and I feel her watching me as I go. The floor feels like rubber beneath me, and I find myself trying to give my confidence a pep talk.

But what's the point of a pep talk? I mean, really. I have to do what we haven't done in weeks. I have to talk to you. How could it have gone from amazing, to bad, to worse?

A month ago, I would have been ecstatic at the news of you assigned to a case with me. We would have smiled and laughed the whole way there. Those memories seem warm to me, compared to the cold I feel now. Do you feel that cold too Greg?

I'm now rounding the corner, on my way to the break room. I know you'll be there. You'll be sitting on the couch, on the corner cushion, drinking a mug of Blue Hawaiian coffee. You'll have today's newspaper in front of you, probably on the entertainment section by now. See G? I know everything about you. You're a creature of habit.

Now I'm at the door and I can see you. Like I expected, you're exactly where you always are, and by the looks of it, you're on the entertainment section.

Here we go. Gently I knock on the door, and see you look up, completely shocked.

"Hey G. We have a case."

XXX

I'm reading the newspaper, but I'm still thinking of you. Every second of the day I do. I just can't focus anymore.

And then I can sense you before you knock. The shock to my heart is unbelievable as I look up and see you there. Your eyes are stressed. More stressed then I've seen them in a long time.

"Hey G. We have a case." You say in your Texan accent. Oh my god, I've missed it. You talking to me again is like heaven. Your voice is perfect.

"Oh." I say quietly; I'm still shocked. "Okay."

I stand up and I have to resist from running to hug you. No, you don't love me. Everything is _not _back to normal.

You keep eye contact a little longer than you need to. It seems like you're longing for something, but for what exactly, I can't figure out.

You turn slowly to walk in front of me, and travel along the hallway. Your arms swing by your sides, and I wish I could hold your hand. But things have changed. So much.

I watch the stares as we walk. The lab techs look on curiously, wondering what had happened. Hodges furrows his eyebrows at me, asking the silent question. I shake my head a minuscule amount. Ray looks on from the layout room, forgetting his photos.

But I find that I just don't care anymore. The only person, whose opinion has ever mattered to me, is yours Nicky.

We step into the elevator, and the awkwardness is so thick you could cut it with a knife. I throw constant glances your way, and almost every time I catch you looking too. Finally, I decide to take a chance.

"Why do you think Catherine assign us his case? I mean... _us._" My voice trembles when you make eye contact, it's something I've missed for so long.

You lean your perfectly shaped body against the elevator wall. "We're the only available CSIs." You say, and look at the floor. I want the doors to open already, but I also really don't.

"Oh."

A few tense seconds later my prayers are answered and the doors slide open with a ding.

And there stands Sara, phone in hand, salad box in the other. She looks at us surprised, but gets in the elevator as we step out. We walk in unison, and I resist the urge to smile. We've always done that.

You look at me when the doors are safely closed. You look frustrated, annoyed...and... I don't know what else.

"Only available CSIs, my ass." You say and walk away from me, heading to your car.

A wave of hurt flows over me. Do you hate me that much Nick? Do you? Are you that pissed off just because you have to work with me?

I sound self-centered, obsessive and childish but... I feel rejected. The tears sting my eyes as your car door slams, adding to the hurt effect.

You must really hate me. But I can't help myself from loving you.

**Like it? Stupid Nick. I promise they'll talk soon! Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Here we go, I think they're going to talk now!... Or at least next chapter for sure!

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

I'm sorry G. I'm so sorry. I lost my temper. It wasn't because of you; it was directed like an arrow, right at Catherine. That liar. That stupid, stupid liar. She thinks she can fix everything between us. But that's impossible. Completely impossible.

I try to ignore your care behind mine, but I can't. I glance in the rear view mirror, and I see you. The guilt is incredible. I think your eyes look red. Were you cryin Greg? Because of me? Shit, I've ruined everything even more, if that's actually possible.

God, I wish you still loved me. Because if you did, and I could find the courage to do the latter, I'd stop this car right now. I'd pull over, stop you, and kiss you right now. I miss you, so much. When you talked to me at the lab, my heart soared. I'd never realized how much I love your voice.

I just noticed my GPS's status. Were about 1 minute away now, and the desert is flying by the windows. I'm now dreading getting out of my SUV. What do we do now?

Crap, we're here G. The gravel crunches under my feet as I step out into the Vegas heat. I slip my sunglasses on, and grab my kit. And then you're beside me, just a little too close. It must be force of habit. You aren't doin that on purpose are you?...no, just habit.

I watch you carefully through my glasses as we crunch across the gravel driveway, up to where the officer is standing.

"Body's in the side room." He says to us, but I don't even acknowledge him.

"Thanks." You say, and I swear I almost smile. Your voice might just be the thing I've missed the most. It's honey-sweet, and I _love _it.

I follow you into the old steel building, for once letting you be the leader. I don't know if I've ever done that before.

You survey your surroundings, seemingly trying to picture the murder in your head. I can see the body through the doorway, and I can already tell this might take awhile. There's blood all over the floor and walls, not to mention the window. This is going to take forever.

You set your kit down in a fluid motion, which makes me want to smile once again. You're just too perfect, G.

All of a sudden, you look up at me, with harsh and confused eyes.

"You gonna help, or just stand there?" You say, a lot of anger directed at me. Oh shit, I'm so sorry.

"Sorry." I mutter, and I hope you hear the truth in it. But you turn back to the room, snapping pictures of the walls.

XXX

Yes, I'm ignoring you. How could you have said that to me? But, then again, I didn't exactly want to be on a case with you either. God, why does this always happen to us? To me?

I'm annoyed as it is, and the never-ending metallic hum that comes from outside just irritates me further.

I snap another picture; we are_ so_ pulling a double. Shit, two shifts with you? I'm, not sure what I feel about that.

On one hand its a good thing, I get to be around you for the whole time. I get to watch your perfect face, I get to hear your perfect voice.

But on the other, it's a really, really bad thing. I have to talk to you, and try not to act awkward. And that's really hard when you're... you.

I work in silence for a few minutes, mostly listening to your footsteps. I could recognize them anywhere.

But the next sound I hear, anyone on the team would recognize. _A gunshot. _My brain goes into overdrive as I spin around to look at you.

You meet my frantic look with a mirrored one on your face. The shot came from outside, but where? Is the officer dead?

But mostly, my thoughts are on you. In the milliseconds that have passed, you've stayed frozen, out in the open.

Not taking the risk of speaking, I motion for you to join me by the other room. At least we have some cover hear.

You jog towards me and I wish I could pull you into my arms. But I can't. God, this is killing me.

Once you're with me, so close I can feel your breath on my longing skin, you pull out your gun. It has taken me till now to realize I'm not armed. Honestly, I never bring my gun when we have a case together. I guess im just used to you being my protector.

You look at me an I see fear in your gorgeous brown eyes.

We hear footsteps, but neither of us dare to move. You have your gun at the ready, your over-defensive mind controlling you.

The shooter's getting closer, but he has a big space to cover.

And then you try to make your move. No, Nicky! I still love you, and you can't do that. You could die! Why can't I say these things to you?

You're about to jump out and shoot him, but I grab you arm. You look back at me in shock, but you seem to think I'm ludicrous.

"Nicky... Please don't." I whisper, barely audible. I'm now thankful for that annoying metallic hum in the background.

"Greg, I have to." You say, and I have to force myself not to kiss you. You're just so brave.

"No, you can't. You could die. I..." I can't seem to finish the sentence. I want to, but I don't know how.

You give me a look that says 'you what?'

"I... I love you."

**And there we go, finally they have spoken! Ahaha **** Review if you liked it, there should be about 2 more chapters. Thanks!**


	5. Chapter 5

AN: And the confessions have arrived.

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

You _what? _You love me? Greg... how...what...? I can't even think. You still love me? I thought you'd moved on! I thought you'd changed! If I had known...If you had told me...

Your eyes are so scared G. You look like you actually love me. You look like you did when we were together. I see the tears form in your amazing brown eyes and... I just can't take it.

"You _what_?" I still can't believe it. But you look genuinely terrified.

"Nicky, I love you. Just don't, please. I can't lose you. I just can't. And I know you don't love me, but-"

I cut you off by putting a hand on your arm.

"I do love you G. I thought you hated me." I whisper, glancing the other way. I still can't see the man, but I can hear his footsteps.

When I look back at you, you have a small smile on your perfect lips. "I could never hate you."

I have a small grin on my face too, I've been waiting weeks for you to say that. But all too soon, it fades.

"But I have to. It's that or we both die. And I can't lose you either." I say, and you sigh. I know I could die G, but I have to protect you.

I know the shooter's almost here. So I cock my gun, and look at you one last time. Your eyes are just so gorgeous Greggo.

I then make my move. As fast as I can, I lean around the corner, surveying the warehouse.

I see the man, and he spots me. The loaded rifle in his hands targets me, and without thinking, I fire my gun several times.

I jump back behind the wall quickly as he fires back, the bullets hitting the cement wall, the chips flying, the noise deafening.

Your hand flies to my shoulder, and I feel the goose bumps on my arms. Despite my fear, and the situation we're in, you still make me feel special. I love you.

I spin back around the corner, only to see the man has walked closer, and all my shots had missed. Not wasting any time, I shoot a few more times, before duck back again.

More return shots whizz through the air, and I realize that if we stay here, we're dead. So, so dead.

"G, we gotta move." I say urgently to you, and you nod. Then I spot the room that's about 15 feet from us. It would be perfect, but we have to get there.

One last time, I fire around the corner, hoping I don't miss. When I hear return shots, I groan. Shit, I must have bad aim.

And then I nod at you, looking into your deep brown eyes one last time, before we make our move.

XXX

Your eyes are endless. I could stare at them all day, and not have a care in the world. They hold secrets, but I know every single one. They hold your traumatic past, which I know all about. They hold love, and now I have no doubt that it belongs to me. But they also hold fear. A fear for you, me and everything that makes up 'us'.

A split second, then we make our move. We begin to run for it, and I hear the cement floor thud loudly.

And then the shots begin. They bang through the air, ricocheting off walls, whizzing past us. He must be firing a few every thirty seconds.

We're almost there Nicky. Just a few more feet. I can see the door, and feel the safety that radiates from it's half-open door.

And all of a sudden you're falling. I just realized we're holding hands, which means if you're down, so am I. _Shit._

We tumble to the ground, and I see your gun clatter across the cold cement. I can hear the gunman walking towards us, and my instinct takes over.

I clamber to my knees, grasping for the gun. My finger finds the trigger and I spin around, protecting you. Nobody can hurt you Nick, nobody. I love you more than anything else.

So I pull my index finger back, and the gun does it's task. The large bang reverberates in the empty warehouse, and I can barely hear the hum anymore.

I sink to the ground in shock, as the man falls over, his eyes staring at nothing.

And not soon enough, your arms are around me, spinning me around to face you. You look... proud.

"Nicky..." I stutter, but I can't finish as your lips crush mine. Now I know what kept me awake at night these last few weeks- it was missing this.

The built up passion is released in our kiss, and when we break apart for air, all I can do is look at you in amazement.

Your eyes trail over me, checking for any injuries. Or maybe you just want to look _with _me knowing. I let myself do the same, tracing your jaw line, moving to cover your perfectly shaped arms, your legs and everything else.

"I..." But I just can't finish the sentence. I'm at a loss for words, and by the looks of it, so are you.

"G..." You say, but showing exactly how much we are alike, you have no words. God, I love it when you call me G though.

"Greg? Nick?" An exasperated Catherine calls from outside. I share a shocked look with you before turning to look at the door.

Catherine, Sara and Brass run inside, guns raised, up until they see the body.

I watch Sara, seeing as though she's my bestfriend. And I see the mischevious, accusing, 'I knew it' look in her eyes as she spots us sprawled on the floor together, no doubt seeming flustered.

Brass looks the usual, regretful, annoyed and grateful all at the same time.

But Catherine seems generally scared. I don't think she can accept what's just happened. But really, who can? The team has had too many close calls lately, what with you being shot at, blown up, and me and Vartann almost being blown to bits. It's too much.

"You two okay?" She asks, possibly still in a slight shock.

I look at you, and have the odd urge to smile. I can see the same feeling radiating from you. Because we're more than okay. I'm the happiest I've been in days. Weeks even.

"Yeah. We're okay." You say, but turn and smile at me.

I think that's when she catches on, but I can't fully see the smile on her face. Nope, I'm just staring at you, caught up in what I like to call perfection.

**They needed their perfect moment. 1 or 2 more chapters, probs one, and yes, they will talk. :p **


	6. Chapter 6

AN: And here we go! The big talk has arrived! Btw, this story was all based on a request! If you have one, inbox me it, I have no life 3

_Disclaimer: Seriously, I don't own CSI!_

**Stares.**

I can't explain how happy I am right now. I just can't. You're still watching me from across the sidewalk, not paying attention to Catherine, who's trying to get your statement.

I on the other hand, am completely ignoring Sara, who's trying to get mine. Who the hell cares anyway? I sure as hell don't. The guy's dead.

God, do you have to look at me like that Nicky? You make me want to run towards you, hug you, and never let go. Thank god you're okay, I wouldn't have been able to live if that damn gunman had hurt you.

"Greg!" Sara says, sounding rather annoyed, and I snap out of it, glancing at her casually. She doesn't buy it.

"Come on, the guy's dead. Why does it matter?" I say, equally annoyed. I just want to be with you.

Sara gives me a mock angered expression. "Please, just tell me what happened, and then you can go be with Nicky."

I blush when she says this, she saw me looking. Actually, I'm pretty sure everyone did.

"Fine. We heard a gunshot, and Nick ran to where I was. We stayed behind the corner, and Nick shot at him. Then when we tried to run, he tripped, and so did I-" I'm interrupted by her.

"Wait... why did you both fall?" She asks sceptically, and smirks. She just_ loves _making a fool out of me.

"We were holding hands." I say, but when I see her smile even bigger I add on. "Shut up."

"Anyway, Nicky dropped his gun, I picked it up, and killed the guy okay?" I just want to hold you in my arms Nick. I want this dumbass interview to be over, so I can be with you.

Finally, my prayers are answered. "Eh, I guess it's good enough. But if Ecklie gets mad, it's your head on the chopping block, not mine." Sara says, but I'm back to staring at you. You smile at me, and I get butterflies.

"Yeah, okay." I say, not really hearing my best friend. Instead, I walk away from her, closing the gap between us quickly. Catherine turns to see me, and she senses we need a private moment. With her gone, I full on beam at you.

"Care for a walk Nicky?" I ask, holding out my hand cheekily. You smile back, forcing back a chuckle, and grab it. It feels amazing to hold your hand again.

We walk away from the scene, ducking under the police tape. Once, we're out of earshot, we walk slower, swinging our arms, our hands firm around each other's.

It's hard to believe what just happened. After we had been taken outside, Brass had told us exactly what happened. The gunman, now ID-ed as Mac Hubbell, had shot Officer Daniels outside, explaining the shot. But the rookie officer had seen him before hand, and radioed the station before he was killed. That explained how Cath, Sara and Brass had gotten there so quickly.

I try to push these thoughts away, because all I want to do is talk to you.

I take a deep breath and stop walking. You slow with me and meet my gaze with a warm one of your own.

"Nicky..." "G..." We say in unison, and we both smile. Yours is so brilliant, I wonder how I lived without it. But I know the answer. I didn't live. Not really.

"You first." I say, chickening out. I'm not good at this.

You nod, and your face falls. God, Nicky, now I regret that.

"I'm sorry Greg. For walking out, and ruining everything. I was just so upset, and I thought you didn't love me so I guess I was... I dunno, a coward. I'm so sorry...I..." I watch as you try to find the right words.

Gently, I put a finger to your lips, stopping your voice. I need to talk.

"Don't blame yourself. If anything, it's my fault. I was the one who yelled, and said all that shit. But I didn't mean it. I'm so sorry. I don't think I could ever put it into words how sorry I am. I just..."

Now it's my turn to shut up, not being able to locate the right words. Or any at all for that matter.

You grab my finger, which is still against your tender lips, and move it away, keeping your hands wrapped around it.

"I forgive you G. Actually, I forgave you the second you said it. I thought I'd made it clear- I can't be mad at you." The look in your beautiful eyes and the cute half-smile on your lips say it all.

"I can't be mad at you either. The only reason I avoided you was that I thought you hated me." I say quietly, looking down at your shoes. But you tilt my head up with your fingers, and I reluctantly look into them.

"Never." You say and there's no way in hell I can take it anymore.

I push myself against you, tasting your lips once again. It's like fireworks are going off in my head. It's like someone is shocking my heart. But mostly, it's like the past few weeks aren't even a part of my life. How could they be, when I wasn't really alive?

My arms wrap around your shoulders, and yours snake around my waist. Yes, everyone always said I was the girl of the relationship. Oh well.

When I break away from you, I see that your eyes are red. And so are mine.

XXX

I smile back at you, wishing I didn't have to be so friggen emotional. I just love you so much.

When I stop staring in your eyes, I notice a small scrape on your arm. I reach out and touch it with my finger, worrying for you. I know it's only a scrape, but it's more the emotional injuries I'm worried about.

"You alright?" I ask, even though I know you're just going to blow it off as nothing.

"Now that we're okay. We are okay right?" You ask, and I hear the doubt it your voice, Greg, of course we are. How could we not be?

"Of course." I say, and hold both your hands in mine.

You smirk at me, and I do the same. Then I chuckle as a strange thought hits me.

"Ecklie's going to try and put us in therapy." I say, and see the look in your eyes. We both know we don't need it. We're better than ever, but he'll still do it.

"Ecklie should have a session, not us. He's a few fries short of a happy meal." You say and I can't control my chuckles. You're hilarious.

I lean in and kiss you, this time brief and soft. Then I pull back and rest my forehead on yours. Seeing your eyes so close is beyond words.

"Always the jokester." I say quietly, just enjoying the view of your eyes.

"_Your_ jokester." You say back, and the warmth encircles me. I love you G. More than you'll ever know. Ever.

"I love you G." I say softly, watching your eyes sparkle.

"I love you more." You say back, your breath hitting my face. I smile in the sunny alley, oblivious to anything except you.

"Impossible." I say back playfully, smirking at you.

"Nah, I think I do."

XXX

_Little did Nick and Greg know, Sara, Catherine and the newly arrived Ray had been watching their exchange._

Sara chuckled as she watched them banter over who loved the other more. It was cute, and it made her realize just how special they were.

"Looks like our boys are happy again." Catherine said, leaning against the SUV. Ray sighed and smiled beside her.

Honestly, Sara was happy too. More than happy actually. She'd been working with Catherine and Ray for weeks, ever since the now famed breakup.

"Yep." She said and smiled too.

They watched the too smile at each other for a little while more before something unexpected happened.

"I know you're there guys." Greg said, but his eyes never left Nick's. All three CSIs flushed red, knowing they'd been caught.

Nick looked up at them, breaking his moment with Greg for the first time.

"You just don't know the meaning of privacy do you?" He said in his Texan voice, and Sara smirked at him.

"Come on Nicky, did you expect them to?" Greg asked teasingly from beside him, and Sara watched qas they turned back to each other.

The last thing she saw before she walked away was their soft kiss. It was the kind of kiss that was loving beyond words. The type that made promises. The type that just said 'happy'.

And that's what they were.

**The end. Review please!**

***Reminder: this was a request I got. If you want me to write something, inbox me! I love a challenge!**


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